“My biggest fear in life is not having a big enough impact on someone’s life to always be remembered.” ~ Unknown
Who the hell can see forever? Some of us have less time than others.
How do you want to be remembered?
For Your Consideration… And Action
“It’s not enough to be busy… The question is: what are we busy about? ~ Henry David Thoreau
A Cautionary Tale
“Look, we know we screwed up when we were in the majority. We fell in love with power. We spent way too much money – especially on earmarks. There was too much corruption when we ran this place. We were guilty. And that’s why we lost.” ~ Eric Cantor
A friend who shares the view that we need to be vigilant given imminent elections forwarded the following today. I hope a little (bad) humor lightens the seriousness of my recent posts.
********************
Sarah was in the fertilized egg business. She had several hundred young pullets and ten roosters to fertilize the eggs.
She kept records and any rooster not performing went into the soup pot and was replaced.
This took a lot of time, so she bought some tiny bells and attached them to her roosters. Each bell had a different tone, so she could tell from a distance which rooster was performing. Now, she could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report just by listening to the bells.
Sarah’s favorite rooster, old Butch, was a fine specimen but, this morning, she noticed old Butch’s bell hadn’t rung at all!
When she went to investigate, she saw the other roosters were busy chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing, but the pullets hearing the roosters coming, would run for cover.
To Sarah’s amazement, old Butch had his bell in his beak, so it couldn’t ring. He’d sneak up on a pullet, do his job, and walk on to the next one.
Sarah was so proud of old Butch, she entered him in a show and he became an overnight sensation among the judges.
The result was the judges not only awarded old Butch the “No Bell Piece Prize”, they also awarded him the “Pulletsurprise” as well.
Clearly old Butch was a politician in the making. Who else but a politician could figure out how to win two of the most coveted awards on the planet by being the best at sneaking up on the unsuspecting populace and screwing them when they weren’t paying attention?
Vote carefully in the next election: You can’t always hear the bells.
Image credit: grit.com
The 14th Amendment
“When you get to a place where you understand that love and belonging, your worthiness, is a birthright and not something you have to earn, anything is possible.” ~ Brene Brown
The latest spew…
Our alleged “unifer” has decided we should no longer comply with the Constitution’s 14th Amendment which grants Birthright Citizenship.
This is a blatantly unconstitutional attempt to fan the flames of anti-immigrant hatred in the days ahead of midterms. You can’t erase the Constitution with an Executive Order.
“He’ll say anything before the election. Don’t take the bait. Focus on ending hate. Hug a kid. Be nice to someone you don’t know or agree with. And vote. Please vote.” – Sen. Amy Klobuchar (D-Minn).
It seems never ending. What’s next??
image credit: todayifoundit.com
Your Money and/or Your Health?
“The black moment is the moment when the real message of transformation is going to come. At the darkest moment comes the light.” ~ James Campbell
A favorite, I last referenced this quote in an October, 2014 post.
I’m sharing it again because it seems to well describe where many are in today’s frightening world.
Brief background: I majored in Economics as an undergrad and further studied the field in graduate business school. In some eyes, this may qualify me as having just enough knowledge to be dangerous. 🙂 Additionally, and to this post’s title, I also have a pre-existing cardiac condition.
As are many of you, I am definitely a member of America’s middle class. I know there are certain facets of our economy that are doing well. But the soaring stock markets, the growing GDP, and freakishly low unemployment do not automatically mean that many Americans are benefiting.
The cost of groceries, gasoline and everyday staples that most of us need, continue to increase at escalating rates. Interest rates are climbing and that hits all who use credit cards. I wonder how many WordPress bloggers actually have substantial money in the equities market? Few, I suspect.
When the current administration cherry picks certain economic indicators to tout as evidence of everything coming up roses, they are not being truthful. Heck, in the last fiscal quarter there was very little increase in equipment investment and a decline in residential investment. These facts do not bode well for short and long-term growth. But this administration is not going to share the bad news with us.
And if you think for a minute that the latest political rhetoric about a 10% middle class tax reduction will materialize, dream on. This administration is only about enriching the already wealthy.
There is a another bridge in Brooklyn they’d like to sell you. The majority party is totally serious (still!) about repealing what remains of the Affordable Care Act and eliminating coverage for pre-existing conditions. This would be devastating legislation.
Think for a moment about a family member or friend who is afflicted with just this sampling of ailments:
- drug abuse treatment
- Alzheimer’s
- arthritis
- cancer
- coronary artery disease
- diabetes
- obesity
- Parkinson’s disease
- stroke
- pending surgery
If the majority party remains in office, they will try every trick in the book to deprive hefty premium paying citizens of health coverage for a host of pre-existing conditions. And the Insurance Companies are salivating at not having to provide this coverage. But they’ll tell you otherwise.
The black moment is nigh, my friends. And it’s only going to get darker before the light returns if we continue to allow heartless legislators to inflict more distress on our middle class, as well as those who have even less.
I believe in promising outcomes. I am not a fear monger. I am as anti-fear instilling as they come. What I am doing is raising awareness about what can happen if the status quo continues.
I urge you to stand your ground and raise your hopeful voice. You have a voice! And you have a vote. We’ve still got time.
Image credit: spectrumlocalnews.com
Basta!
“Do not go gentle into that good night.” ~ Dylan Thomas
This quote is by the Welsh poet who implored his father to: Rage, rage, rage against the dying of the light. He begged him to live boldly and to fight.
By nature and nurture, I am not a fighter. Yet, like some of you, when pressed beyond rational and reasonable limits, I lean into my frustration. Okay, my anger. 🙂
I loathe lies, especially blatant lies; particularly lies that harm other people.
As an individual living in integrity, I find unacceptable false claims and deceit.
Proclamations of ignorance and public displays of anything but the truth, curdle my core.
Maybe it has to do with many of us being people of character. We find such practices and behaviors ugly and unacceptable.
A country that doesn’t take care of its women and take care of its children in our schools is not a country we can fight for.
We need to be even better human beings. We need our voices to be heard loud and clear.
More importantly, we must be proactive and vote! Being passive participants does not enable or serve our collective welfare.
In my five years of blogging, I have not ventured into politics. I have chosen to focus on positive messaging and opportunities for each of us to consider and embrace.
But the negativity and the divisiveness that gnaws at us, relentlessly, is neither positive nor encouraging.
We can change this my friends. Your inalienable right to vote is more valuable now than ever. Please register to vote. Exercise your right to redirect our politics onto a fair and equitable path – devoid of the fear which so many stoke.
As Thomas beseeched, Live boldly and fight.
Image credit: Light Work/For Freedoms
What Others Need Now
“Make yourself necessary to somebody.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
The next few posts will reflect a side of me that few have read. As evidenced in many of my to-date posts, it has always been a desire to inspire from thoughtful places. From an often heart-centric space, I have believed that taking action is key to transforming our dreams and hopes into healthy growth and constructive outcomes. Follow-on posts may be a bit less cautious and comforting.
But to today’s share…
People watching / observing human interaction is a favorite pastime. I got to do this today, waiting (for quite a while) in a hospital pavilion. Behaviors abounded ranging from sheer joy to bewilderment, from rudeness to emotionally drained — with smiles, laughter, tears and ugliness interspersed. And I got to thinking…
There are a lot of people who are vain and arrogant, who see themselves as the center of the world. And I wondered… if the human species ceased to exist today, while the animals that we underrate lived on, would the world be changed for the better? Then I snapped out of it, reflecting instead on how we favorably impact others.
When I think about the people who made the biggest impact in my life, it has been those who showed a sincere belief in me; those who let me know through their words and actions that I mattered. And to me, mattering is a universal human need, one that each of us have an opportunity to satisfy.
With those people I observed today, the mere fact that they were born, that they exist, regardless of their circumstances, mood or looks — reminded me that each one of them is indispensable, necessary, and irreplaceable. They matter.
Have we become superambitious and hyperproductive in order to create some semblance of outer control in place of no inner control? Are we that detached from our fellow-man? I think not. Rather, I think we sometimes forget that we can create a world in which each of us knows we matter, believing in ourselves and supporting one another. Actions you take today can make a difference in someone’s life tomorrow. And that ripple would carry into future generations. Just imagine…
If you are unsure about what to do when you encounter or interact with someone significant or yet-to-be significant in your life, here are three things to consider:
- Notice everyone. When you do, you recognize their value and importance. Go out of your way to acknowledge people. Make an effort to “see” them. I’m not going to suggest how; this is where you get to play.
- Ask meaningful questions. We show people how much they matter by the questions we ask. For example: How can I make your day? Do you know how smart you are? Are you aware of all you have accomplished today? People’s feelings can be significantly changed, simply by your thoughtful questions.
- Show hope. How you interact with people you meet could be the stimulant that provides them with encouragement for a better day. Enthusiastically, let others know you believe in them and their potential. The idiom Hope Springs Eternal does infer promise. 🙂
Untethering
“If experience is the best teacher, there’s nothing that comes close to the experience of life.” ~ Michael A. Singer
I’ve not discovered a cure for a major disease nor have I invented something that radically changes how we live. And it’s probably fair to say that neither have you. Still, we are significant; why else would we be here? Each of us is making a contribution to humanity simply by living in full expression of who we are. For whatever or however you are contributing, I honor and respect you!
Life is about continuous progress; the ability to move forward and achieve your own version of greatness. To get there, however, some of us need to let go of things from our past and listen to our inner voice that can urge us toward a space that seems both unclear and at times, crazy.
When we listen to our voice we begin to imagine and dream about following this higher knowing and the possibilities that lie ahead. Sometimes though, when we start to believe in such prospects, the ego-mind interjects itself and we find ourselves doubting our dreams and desires. And we retreat. You’re familiar with this, right?
So, why do we self-sabotage? One reason for inaction can be understood when an individual not progressing is viewed as part of a larger social situation. When one has to marshal the herd and get others to move, there is some risk that accompanies that. It is much easier to not lead the way, blend into the crowd, and wait for somebody else to assume the risk and be responsible. In social psychology this is called the “bystander effect.” But when others are not involved, it becomes justly about you.
If you are On A Verge, listening to your inner voice, perhaps sensing opportunity and an associated need to untether, these considerations are important to remember:
- Appreciate what you have. Rather than focusing on what you think may be missing from your life, reflect on that with which you are blessed. It’s too easy to look at the people you surround yourself with and want what they have. Just because someone has material possessions doesn’t mean s/he is internally happy. Be grateful for what is most important to you instead of what you perceive as lacking.
- Take full responsibility. Near always, you are responsible for the quality and condition of your life. Sometimes we choose to do nothing when we get hit hard because it’s just easier (and less painful) that way. But disappointment is often only deferred. You have to live with that inner voice that says you didn’t try hard enough in pursuit of your dreams/desires. It’s your choice to plow through and keep moving forward.
- Do one simple thing. To move forward; start moving. One step, small steps, in the direction of your goal or vision is progress. Determine one (simply one!) area of your life where you have wanted to move forward. Spend time visualizing what it would take to get you started. And act! Take that first step. Then, move on to the next step.
Dread du jour
“Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important.” ~ Ambrose Redmoon
I went online today to do some research. I figured mainstream news feeds might have the data I sought. What an ugly mistake. For readers unaware, I don’t watch television/cable, nor do I read newspapers or magazines. And my online experience today reaffirmed why I do not.
I quickly scanned several well-known sources and 37 out of 39 articles (yes, I counted) featured stories about doom and gloom. The ‘hit parade’ included headlines screaming about:
- Ebola
- terrorism
- climate change
- social injustices
- illegal immigration
- police brutality
- political propaganda
- economic demise
- inadequate militaries
- religious superiority
- murders, deaths, out of control crime
- extremists everything
Not a single positive, feel good or constructive story. Just fear and demise.
Bewildered, I asked myself, “Is this really what we have let ourselves become?” “Have we given in to those who fulminate?” “Are people really buying into the endless dread the media is stoking?”
Fear in any form is an impediment to the free flow of our existence and growth. It limits and restricts our ability to navigate our lives. Fear drains significant emotional energy that otherwise could be available to manifest our inalienable desires and intentions.
FEAR is an acronym in the English language for “False Evidence Appearing Real.” Politicians, religious zealots, military decision-makers and greedy corporate leaders use fear simply to advance their agendas and fortunes.
I/you/we don’t have to ingest this daily dosing of fear. We have enough going on in our own lives to keep us challenged, to sustain our wellness, to fuel our dreams, and to fulfill our happiness goals. We’ve got possibilities and opportunities on which to focus and enjoy!
Certain fears are valid and sometimes, fear can be useful. But not an endless onslaught. If you desire to reclaim some peace, assurance, and hope in your life, you can. For starters, consider these ideas when you feel overwhelmed by fear:
- Accept that you will be fearful. If you accept that you will have fear and it is a natural part of life, then you can move on and take action. Not everything needs to be an apocalypse. Fear will always be with us and when we recognize it we can endure it with courage. We will not get rid of fear but accepting it will make it that much easier to take the next positive step.
- Manage your sources of fear. When terrible things happen, there isn’t a reason to force yourself to participate. Watching endless repeats of violent newscasts or disasters will increase your fear greatly and for nothing in return other than awful images and worries. It often only makes you feel more helpless.
- What could I be doing instead? There is little use driving yourself crazy wondering “what if?” A lot of what you read/hear is fabricated anyway and out of your control. If you are powerless, focus instead on what you can control. Events that you have no influence on are a waste of your time; even though “the voices” want you to believe everything.
A Perspective on Loss
“We don’t let go of anything important until we have exhausted all the possible ways that we might keep holding on to it.” ~ William Bridges
It is fair to say each of us has strengths and weaknesses. What is interesting is on which we choose to focus. You can readily identify your most robust strength and your biggest weakness (acknowledging a weakness can be a strength and vice versa). And for all of my actual and perceived strengths, I know that handling loss is what I am least equipped to deal with — my weakness, if you will.
In two blog posts today, I read and was reminded of how common loss is. We simply don’t confront it until, somehow, it ‘hits home.’ And ‘home’ is a different place within each of us.
Losing someone or something you care deeply about is very painful. The range of emotions we experience, may never let up. There are many reactions to significant loss. And while there are no right or wrong ways to grieve, there are healthy ways to cope with the pain that, in time, can renew and permit one to move on.
Part of loss deals with searching for answers and meaning; trying to make sense of it all. While some may never fully recover, allowing grief to run its course is part of a time-undefined progression. In this vein, I recall reading a Robert Hall, Jr. perspective which he describes as the “fertile void,” a time of not knowing what is arising, what to do, or how to feel. And in this void people find themselves making changes to fill the void, sometimes even returning to something familiar — the way things were.
I know it’s cliché yet, “There is light at the end of the tunnel,” is something that can give one hope for the future after a long and difficult period.
We have countless ways to cope with loss. These four make sense to me. If you have others that you’ve found helpful, please feel free to share them in comments.
- Surrender. We cannot bring back what we have lost. We cannot undo a war or a natural disaster. Experiencing our loss and our feelings is a natural process, but it can lead us into deeper suffering, too. Surrendering to the situation as something we cannot change, and accepting that, can help us to release and honor grief in a healthy way.
- Write a brief letter to yourself or loved one of what you wanted to say before the loss. Putting your words on paper or expressing things you wish you could have said before the event or loss might help you work through feelings and emotions that you need to let out or put behind you.
- Connect meaningfully with others. Finding the right approach to deal with tragedy is a very personal thing. Pain in the short run in unavoidable, and that’s okay. The goal is not to let the pain break you in the long run. Consider being in “flow,” having an intense focus on the present day and attempting to connect with others.
- Believe that someone else is in control. Just as contentment and happiness come into our lives unexpectedly, so too does loss. Perhaps important, is to believe that another is in control, no matter what.
