You Know It. Trust It.

“Ego is simply an idea of who you are that you carry around with you.” ~Wayne Dyer

Sometimes people ask me how they can get rid of their ego. I think what they are really asking is how can they get rid of that part of themselves that sabotages them and makes them unhappy. My answer is that you don’t have to get rid of your ego, just stop believing what it is telling you.

The ego-mind is the part of us that interprets our experiences using our belief system as a filter. These learned beliefs are used to look at a situation and give it meaning. The meanings will be as distorted as our beliefs are about ourselves. How can our beliefs be distorted? Easily. Our beliefs are learned from what people have told us and how they rewarded, punished and made us feel. We believe about ourselves what the world has told us to believe.

Fortunately, we have another guidance system, our knowing. Call it the inner voice, heart or higher intelligence – whatever we want to call it. It is there and the more we trust it, the clearer we will be about ourselves and our experiences. This means the less we have to depend on the ego to provide the distorted version from our learned beliefs.

Make sense?

There is a simple way to access this inner guidance system. Rather than fight with our ego and especially the meanings it is providing, we need only ask a simple question: “What do I know to be true right now?” Ask the question and sit quietly and listen. Then begin stating what you know to be true in a situation, especially about yourself. For example, rather than a belief that others are judging you and that means you are going to be embarrassed or fail, the question above provides a different perspective. You know that:

  • The judgment is not necessarily from others but from yourself and your fear of being judged.
  • You are competent and knowledgeable and can make good choices and take productive action.
  • Others are just as concerned about being judged by you.

These are some possibilities of what is known. There are many more. We each know a lot and what we know, can be trusted. You only have to ask the question, listen and trust.

The more you do this, the less your ego mind will have to provide meanings in a situation. Without meanings we are free to respond to what is before us. By trusting what you know, your responses will be effective and leave you feeling confident.

25 thoughts on “You Know It. Trust It.

  1. Well said. But sometimes don’t you wish Ego and Inner Guidance had distinct voices so you could tell the difference fast? I’d settle for different accents. But then would that fall under the classification of ‘she’s hearing voices’? heehee

  2. Interesting. You ought to look into a patent for the idea! 🙂

    In my case, I’m attuned to my inner voice so I know and trust it when it counsels. I’ve nurtured and learned how to listen to it over many years. As for Ego, I know its telltales, too. When it rears (either rudely or subtly), I merely acknowledge its presence and thank it for chiming in. I then move on. More often than not, ego whispers when I don’t need its contribution.

    Here’s to your sorting through the accents. 🙂

  3. Hello there. Thanks for dropping by my blog. I don’t know how you found me. I hope you were not looking for chocolates. 😉

    Ah, the ego. Ever the troublemaker for some people. Didn’t they say you should leave it behind when you leave your house every morning?

    I wonder what the solitary acorn means in your header photo. It looks forlorn there.

    • Of course I was looking for chocolate. Is there not a more noble quest?

      I don’t leave ego behind. It can serve useful purposes. I’ve just learned to co-exist, with clarity that I’m the one making decisions – based on my knowledge. Ego’s often just along for the ride.

      Thanks for asking about my header visual. It was intentionally chosen. I prefer to invite readers/visitors to conjure their own opinion of what it may represent. Hint: there is a nod to strength in the image.

      Appreciate your curiosity and visit.

  4. Working with people who have a very good skill, I sometimes wonder if its knowledge or ego, a little of both I think, but that’s what makes them good at what they do. Excellent writing.

  5. Yes, it makes sense. I really appreciate your question you offer in this post: (my paraphrase) What do I know to be true? This is a post I would like to give a 2nd read. There are a few things to unpack. The ego … we don’t have to get rid of it (I agree), but how do we handle our ego, so that it doesn’t handle us … good post.

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  7. Hi again Eric, Trust is the real rub for me, most of what you and I blog about I’m comfortable with and understand, even live much of the time. But trusting, accessing and acting on my inner guidance is much more challenging. I’m practicing some tools I’ve learned and feel that I’m getting closer to trust. Trust seems like a matter of faith and yet one must believe to have it. Paradox!!

    • I believe it’s very much a matter of faith, Brad. And I commend you for actively focusing on how to get even closer to trust. I experienced an “awareness” breakthrough when I attended a full day workshop on trust – where the betrayal facet was highlighted. It was powerfully enlightening.

      So the curious coach in me would love to know, what is it about embracing your inner guidance that is challenging? No obligation to answer; consider it a rhetorical question to reflect upon. Be well.

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